Magic Nuclear: My Terrorist Friend

Greyhound Bus Station, Albuquerque:

It’s simple really. Doors open to nice people, nice and beautiful people...

Like when the pilgrims landed on Plymouth Rock. They sent out as emissary their most beautiful single young girl. Her name was Mary Anne. (--it was really hard to find that out)

She said, “Hey Savage. You’re handsome.”

“Would you like to be my wife?” He said back.

“Shit,” she mumbled, “this guy speaks gobble-d-gook.” Mary Anne walked back across the beach to the boat. The oarsman was there. “He don’t understand,” she said to him. “Well, at least I haven't been ravaged. Let’s go”.

The oarsman heaved through the bay. And another boat approached. It was Jesse the Chief Proctor (--they say that’s where Jesse the Body got his name). He was with four of the common men with one on the oars.

She called out through the wind, “Fucking prick don’t speak English.” The oarsman looked up at her.
“What’s that?” Jesse asked as they came along. The two oarsmen nodded to each other.
“..the chief or whatever they sent out—“

“Were they armed?” Jesse asked after ropes were exchanged between the small boats.
“I’ll say.”

“Guns, do they have guns?”

“No, bow and arrow. Metal knives though. And saw some French leather work”

“So, they’ve had contact with Quebec.”

“Probably,” she said, “But I don’t think they’ve gotten wind of the religion, or you think with a white women they might have at least tried some French—if they had it. But they seem alright,” she went on, “So, get the preachers up. And tell them they might have someone to talk to.”

“You know Mary Ann," Jesse said to her, “if anything ever happened to my wife, I mean, like those savages killed her or something. Well, you know," he took a long look at the figures on the shore, and went on, "I just wanted you to know.”

“That’s very nice Jess.”

“And hopefully they won’t kill me either.” And he tapped the oarsman on the shoulder who undid the ropes, and they were off.

The boy up in the crows nest of the Mayflower had yelled down, “the lady is underway, sir”

And the captain had rubbed his whickers before informing the Manifest General, Mr. Sneed, who then had his acrimonious assistant relay the message authorizing the release of the diplomatic launch. But Jesse had been waiting underneath the mast for the news and anticipated the order.

But that’s how it happened with the Pilgrims. They didn’t need to use their guns and precious powder on anything but game. A door had been opened. And the indians gave them a rock--symbolizing permeanence. It’s only that some people have come after, changing the story to suit them. And they've have had no shame, even vandalizing the stone. And it’s those people who have made me and Magic Nuclear the best of friends.

l'a-r0